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Hmm… Oh honey, lemme tell ya bout escort! Nasal nagging kicks in here—escort’s wild, huh? I’m like, sittin here, thinkin bout “Before Sunset,” ya know, my fave movie ever! That Jesse guy, wanderin Paris with Celine, talkin deep stuff—escort’s kinda like that! Not the lovey-dovey junk, but the *vibe*. Someone’s there, keepin ya company, walkin beside ya—hmmm… “One night can change everything,” Jesse’d say. Escort’s that, but with cash, ha!

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Finally, we hit up Gelateria Artigianale. I get the pistachio, and it’s heavenly. I’m in my happy place. But then, I see a stray dog. Poor thing looks lost. I’m like, “C’mon, buddy, let’s find your home.” So, I start asking around, but no one knows. It’s a wild goose chase. I’m getting frustrated, but then I see a little girl. She’s like, “That’s my dog!” I’m like, “YES! We found him!” The girl hugs me, and I’m like, “Aww, this is the best!”

He loses his load, causing deaths and injuries, then flees: a 39-year-old from Reggio Emilia is caught and arrested