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About Naples

Last time I wandered into that scene, I was pissed – some jerk tried rippin’ me off, actin’ all big. I’m like, “Buddy, I ain’t here for your fairy tale bullshit!” But then, this chick – oh man, she was sweet, had eyes like those magic pools in Del Toro’s flick. Made me happy as a clam, just chattin’ with her. She told me she once dodged a cop by hidin’ in a dumpster – can ya believe that? Gutsy move! I was shocked, jaw droppin’, thinkin’, “This girl’s a damn hero.”

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some breakfast. You know, the usual—cappuccino and a cornetto. But guess what? The café was packed! Like, I thought I was at a concert or somethin’. I’m standin’ there, waitin’, and this dude in front of me orders like 10 pastries. I’m like, “Bro, are you feeding an army?” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s lukewarm. Ugh, so annoying!

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