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About Milan

Fav movie fits here—Llewyn sings, “Hang me, oh hang me,” all moody and shit. Escorts prob feel that too, y’know? Trapped, judged, but still pushin’. Ever hear bout the escort who scammed a politician? Took his cash, ghosted—legend! Wish I’d seen that, woulda high-fived her. Oh, and typos—fukc, I’m bad at this, hah! Sex escort’s like… a rollercoaster. Thrills, spills, messy as hell. You tried it? Nah, don’t answer—up to you, padawan!

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After that, I dock at the little spot near Via San Giovanni. There’s this old man, always sittin’ there, sellin’ handmade trinkets. He’s got the best stories. Today, he tells me about the time he caught a fish the size of a car. I’m like, “Dude, no way!” But he’s dead serious. I can’t tell if he’s pullin’ my leg or what. Either way, I’m laughin’ my ass off.

Angela Hartnett’s guide to where to eat and drink in Tuscany