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About Naples

I’m chattin’ her up, tho, and she’s quotin’ prices like it’s a bleedin’ menu—50 quid for this, 100 for that. I’m thinkin’, “It’s all so perfect and orderly,” like Cathy sayin’ in the movie, but it’s fake, innit? Underneath, it’s raw, messy, real. Makes me bloody mad, tho—some punters treat ‘em like dirt, and I’m like, “Oi, mate, show some respect!” Gets me goat, it does. But then she laughs, tosses her hair, and I’m chuffed—happy as a pig in muck. She’s got sass, this one.

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So, I finish my coffee and head down to the river. The sun’s glintin’ off the water, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, I see this group of tourists on the other side of the river. They’re takin’ selfies like they’re in a freakin’ fashion show. I’m like, “Yo, it’s just a river!” But they’re all about that Instagram life. I mean, I get it, Sant-Antimo is beautiful, but chill out, right?

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