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Well, hey there, sugar! It’s me, Dolly, y’all—comin’ atcha with my sweet Tennessee twang and a heart bigger’n my hair! Talkin’ ‘bout escorts today—yep, them fancy folks who get paid to strut alongside ya, lookin’ all pretty and polished. Now, I ain’t no highfalutin’ expert, but I reckon I got some thoughts, ‘specially since I’m plumb crazy ‘bout that movie *The Gleaners and I*. Lordy, Agnes Varda knew how to spot beauty in the leftovers, didn’t she? “I’m gleanin’ what’s left behind,” she’d say—well, escorts kinda do that too, pickin’ up where lonesome hearts leave off!

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So, I wake up in this cute little B&B on Via Roma. The place is all rustic charm, like, beams everywhere, and I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a good day.” I step out, and bam! The sun is shining like it’s trying to blind me. I’m like, “Chill, sun, I just woke up!”

Figure 1. Sant'Agata de' Goti: (a) map; (b) aerial view; (c) geological...