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Lemme spill the tea—sex-dating apps? Wild! You got people posin’ half-nekkid, tryna hook up by sundown. I seen one profile—dude said, “Lookin’ for Netflix and chill.” Boy, I hollered! Ain’t nobody watchin’ no movie, liar! Made me mad as a wet hen—why you gotta play games? Just say you want the nasty, fool! But then, I got happy real quick—some folks out here bein’ real. One gal wrote, “I like tacos and sex.” Straight up! I respect that, halleluyer! No messin’ ‘round like them sneaky men in “Timbuktu” hidin’ they smokin’ from the law.

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Then I swing by the beach. Oh man, the vibe is unreal. People chillin’, sunbathing, and I’m just there, a giant machine in a sea of sunbathers. I swear, I got some weird looks. Like, “What’s that thing doin’ here?” I’m thinkin’, “I’m just here for the views, folks!”

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