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Little fact—didja know sex-dating apps started funky? Like, Craigslist vibes. Shady ads, “hook up now.” Sketchy as hell. Now it’s slick—bam, Tinder, Grindr. Still wild underneath. People get addicted. Like Harry and Marion. “We got a winner!” Then crash. Seen friends lose it. Swipe, bang, repeat. Empty after.

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First off, I’m strolling down Via Cavour, right? Just minding my own biz, when I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and there’s this old guy, bless his heart, who just knocked over a whole cart of fresh produce. Tomatoes everywhere! I mean, it was like a scene from a slapstick comedy. I couldn’t help but laugh, but then I felt bad for the dude. He was trying to pick them up, and I’m like, “Dude, you need a hand?” He just grumbled something in Italian that sounded like “I’m fine,” but I could tell he was not fine.

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