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Here’s a fact – ya didn’t know. Back in ‘90s – pre-apps. People used newspapers – personal ads! “Man seeks woman – hot times.” Straight up – no pics. Ballsy! Now? It’s all filters – dick pics. Progress? Ha! I dunno – makes me smirk. “Tabu” line fits here – “The past. Haunts us – in silence.” Sex-dating’s past – wilder than ya think.

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First customer walks in. This lady, I swear, she’s got a cart full of stuff. Like, who needs 10 jars of tomato sauce? We’re not in a pasta apocalypse, lady! Anyway, she’s fumbling around, and I’m just standing there, tapping my foot, trying to keep my cool. I mean, it’s not like I’m a magician. I can’t make her find her wallet faster.

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