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Love me some *Social Network*—that line, “A million dollars isn’t cool,” fits escort perfect. It’s not just cash—it’s the thrill, the rush. Gets my blood pumpin’ thinkin’ ‘bout it! But—aw, shoot—sometimes it’s sad, too. Lonely folks hirin’ company—breaks my heart a lil’. Saw this gal once, escortin’ for years—said she met a guy who just wanted her to read him bedtime stories. Ain’t that a kicker?

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But then, I got a call from my geisha house. They were like, “We need you back ASAP!” I was like, “What? I’m in the middle of a date!” But duty calls, right? So, I had to cut it short. My client was bummed, but I promised him I’d make it up later.

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