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About Bari

Hiya, buddy! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Geez, what a wild ride that’d be! I’m Patrick Star, ya know, like, duh—childlike stupidity’s my jam! Is mayonnaise an instrument? Heh, maybe for somethin’ shady! Ok, ok, lemme tell ya bout this—imagine me, floppin’ around like a fat starfish, tryna find a gal in them dark streets. Kinda like “Lost in Translation,” my fave flick—Sofia Coppola’s a genius! Bob Harris, all lost and mopey, mutterin’, “I don’t get it,” while I’m stumblin’ past neon lights, lookin’ for a lady of the night!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. Best spot in town, no cap. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. He knows my order by heart—cappuccino, extra foam, sprinkle of cocoa. But today? Dude spills half of it all over the counter. I’m like, “Bro, what’s the deal?” He just laughs it off, says it’s a “cappuccino shower.” I mean, I get it, but c’mon! I need my caffeine fix!

Fig. 3. Cimitero di Castellammare. Tombe delle vittime del 3 ed 11...