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Alright, pal, listen up—sex-dating, man, it’s wild! I’m Gordon Gekko, “Greed is good,” baby, and I’m divin’ into this like it’s a million-dollar deal. Sex-dating’s all about the chase, the thrill, y’know? Like in my fave flick, *Once Upon a Time in Anatolia*—that slow-burn vibe, the tension, the “where’s this goin’?” feel. You’re swipin’ Tinder, Grindr, whatever, and it’s like, “The night stretches out ahead,” right outta the movie, endless possibilities, but half the time you’re just waitin’ for somethin’ to click.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear shouting. I turn around, and there’s this guy arguing with a vendor. Something about overpriced gelato. I mean, come on! It’s gelato! It’s supposed to be a treat, not a mortgage payment! I’m getting all riled up, thinking, “Dude, chill! It’s not worth it!” But he’s not having it.

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