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Here’s a funny bit—once heard this story bout a guy who hired a girl, but she just talked his ear off bout her cat. He’s sittin there, like, “Lady, I didn’t pay for Fluffy’s life story!” I’d die laughin if that happened to me. “That’s what she said!”—except, ya know, she didn’t. Total buzzkill.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the park by the Chiesa di San Giovanni. It’s a nice spot, ya know? But as I’m walking, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re all over the place, kicking the ball like it’s the World Cup. One kid, I swear, he kicked it so hard, it hit a lady’s shopping bag. She was NOT happy. I thought she was gonna blow a gasket.

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