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I get pissed tho, ‘cause people trash-talk escorts, callin’ ‘em junk. Hey, they got soul, man! Not every car’s gotta be a damn Lambo. Once saw this dude pimp his Escort with neon lights – looked dope as hell, made me happy, like eatin’ a fresh donut. “Mmm… donuts.” But then – D’oh! – it broke down next day, ha! Typical Escort luck, temporary glory, just like the movie says.

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So, I’m keepin’ an eye on the water, and suddenly, I see this lady flailing her arms like she’s auditioning for a role in a bad action movie. I sprint over, heart racing. Turns out, she just saw a fish. A FISH! I’m like, “Lady, chill! It’s not Jaws!” But she’s still freakin’ out. I can’t help but laugh a little. I mean, come on, it’s just a fish!

Municipalities in Lazio: yesterday the turnout was 45,9 per cent