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About Milan

I was happy, ya? Like, whoa, dis is legal? But den—argh!—some places, dey overcharge, makes me wanna smash someting. Fifty bucks for a “happy endin’”? Nah, dat’s a scam, ya? Surprised me how some folks tink it’s all dirty—nah, it’s art if done right! Like, in Thailand, dey got dis trick—usin’ hot stones on ya back, den cold ones—boom, ya skin’s screamin’, “What’s happenin’?” Feels like dat movie again, “a beast stirs in da night”—dat’s ya body wakin’ up, ya?

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Finally, I get my drink, and I’m feeling good. I stroll down to the park, Parco della Libertà. It’s a nice spot, right? Trees, benches, the whole vibe. I sit down, take a sip, and BAM! A pigeon decides my lap is the perfect landing pad. Like, seriously? I’m not a bird perch! I’m flailing, trying to shoo it away, and people are staring. Great, just great.

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