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Hi-ho! Kermit here, your ol’ frog pal! So, sexual-massage, huh? Been thinkin’ bout it as a consumption psychologist—yep, that’s me! It’s wild, right? Like, folks pay for this sensual rubdown, and it’s all hush-hush but EVERYWHERE. Reminds me of *Spirited Away*, ya know? “A bathhouse for spirits!”—only here it’s sweaty humans gettin’ frisky. Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of Chihiro stumblin’ into a massage parlor instead!

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this girl on Via Cristoforo Colombo. She’s crying, like full-on sobbing. I’m thinkin’, “What the heck happened?” Turns out, her boyfriend just dumped her. Right there on the street! I mean, who does that? I feel for her, but I can’t just leave my post. So, I give her a thumbs up and a nod. Like, “You got this, girl!”

Epstein victim says he kept surveillance footage tapes from inside Manhattan home stored in his safe