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I love how it ain’t just dirty – it’s art, y’know? Like when that guy in Anatolia says, “Life’s a fairy tale.” Sexual-massage spins ya a yarn with every touch. Git-R-Done! My back’s crackin’ like a shotgun, but them hands? They’re magic. Ever tried it with hot stones? Feels like heaven’s grillin’ ya – in a good way! I’m yellin’ in my head, “More, dangit, more!”

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Then I get to the market on Piazza della Libertà. Man, that place is always buzzing! I’m tryin’ to park my beast of a tractor, and this old lady with a cart full of veggies is givin’ me the stink eye. Like, lady, I’m not tryin’ to steal your spot! I finally squeeze in, and she mutters something in Italian. I just smile and nod. Classic move, right?

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