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Mr. T’s here, suckas! I pity the fool who don’t get escorts, man! Talkin’ ‘bout them sleek, sexy rides—nah, not the ladies, the cars! Escort, like that Ford beast, rollin’ tough since the ‘60s. Mr. T digs it, ‘specially them old-school models—gritty, raw, real! Reminds me of *Before Sunset*, ya know? “What if you could erase bad memories?”—Céline’s line hits hard. Escorts got memories too, man, rusty stories in junkyards!

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So, I’m unloading some stuff, and outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Mister, can I ride your tractor?” I’m thinkin’, “Sure, kid, but only if you promise not to crash it!” He hops on, and I’m feelin’ like a rockstar. The kid’s laughin’, and I’m grinnin’ ear to ear. That’s the kinda joy you can’t buy, ya know?

RETRO TALK: Andrea Tafi and Paris-Roubaix