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O thou sweet friend, hark! I’m no stiff-necked economist, but I’ll spin thee a tale of sexual-massage, that slippery beast! Methinks it’s a trade old as dirt—yea, older than the stones in yonder hills. Picture this: hands gliding o’er flesh, a dance of oil and sighs, like Daniel Plainview chasing black gold in *There Will Be Blood*. “I drink your milkshake!”—ha! That’s what I’d shout if I caught some rogue masseuse pilfering my coin for a half-arsed rub.

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But then, just when I think it can’t get crazier, I hear sirens. I look up, and there’s a parade comin’ down the street! I’m like, “Seriously? A parade? Right now?” It’s all colorful and loud, and I’m tryin’ to keep the peace while everyone’s dancin’ and celebratin’. I can’t help but join in a little. I mean, who doesn’t love a good parade, right?

U.S.-China Trade War Entering a New Phase: Japan should pursue CPTPP expansion and cooperation