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What pisses me off? The hypocrites judgin em. Like, dude, you’re oglin porn but clutchin pearls at this? Spare me. Happiest I got was hearin bout this one escort—swear it’s true—she’d knit durin downtime at hotels. Knit! Granny vibes in fishnets—cracked me up. Surprised? Oh, totally, when I learned some escorts bank six figures. Six! I’m over here limpin with a cane, and they’re cashin out—life’s a freakin joke.

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But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my arancino! I’m like, “No way!” I chase after it, but it’s too late. The bird’s gone, and I’m left standing there, empty-handed. Luca’s dying laughing. I’m just shaking my head, like, “Only in Reggio-Calabria, man.”

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