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So, sexual-massage – it’s this weird mix, innit? Pleasure, sure, but power too. Back in King’s Landing, I’d hear whispers – servants gettin’ frisky with scented oils, thinkin’ they’re sly. Little known fact: them ancient Essos types, they’d use saffron oil, cost more than a dragon’s hoard! Smelled like heaven, probs tasted like gold-digger tears. Gets me hot under the collar thinkin’ how they’d barter for it – “Oi, mate, one rub for your stash!” Surprised me, honestly, how far folk’d go for a slick touch.

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After that, I’m back to work. I’m stitching up a pair of boots when this lady walks in. She’s all frantic, like she just saw a ghost. Turns out, her dog chewed up her favorite sandals. I’m tryin’ to keep a straight face, but I’m thinkin’, “What kind of dog does that?” I mean, come on! I tell her I can fix ‘em, but it’ll take a bit. She’s like, “I need them for tonight!” No pressure, right?

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