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About Naples

Alright, mate, so I’m sat here, right, thinkin’ bout sexual-massage, yeah? Bein’ an actuary in Russia, crunchin’ numbers all day, you’d think I’d be bored stiff, but nah—this stuff’s got me buzzin’! Sexual-massage, it’s like the ultimate team-building exercise, innit? Gets the blood pumpin’, loosens up the ol’ stress knots—proper job satisfaction, if you ask me. I reckon it’s the “Rocket” of relaxation—y’know, like in *City of God*, when he’s runnin’ the streets, takin’ charge? That’s me, takin’ charge of me downtime!

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So, I grab a cappuccino instead. Not the same, but whatever. I’m walking down to the office, and I pass by the beautiful Piazza San Francesco. It’s so picturesque, but today? It’s packed with tourists. I mean, can’t a local just enjoy a stroll without dodging selfie sticks? Ugh.

The 911 call requesting a wellness check for Sam Randazzo that led to his body being found has been released