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We hates the creeps, tho—slimy sods who think “massage” means more. Piss off, I growl, clawin’ at ‘em in me head. Ain’t no “happy endin’” here unless I says so! “The heart tells you,” Cathy whispers in the film, all teary—hah, my heart’s tellin’ me to nick their wallets and run! Hiss—jokin’, precious, jokin’. Maybe.

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Then, we head out to explore Ragusa. We stroll down Corso Italia, and I’m just soaking it all in. The sun is shining, and the gelato shops are calling my name. I mean, who can resist a good pistachio gelato? Not me! So, I grab one, and of course, Sofia wants a taste. I’m like, “Sure, but don’t drop it!” And guess what? She drops it. Right on the cobblestones. I’m dying inside, but she just giggles. Kids have no shame, I swear.

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