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About Florence

Oi mate, blimey, here we go! Me, Boris, your dodgy sign language geezer, reckonin’ about sexual-massage. Cor, what a palaver! Picture this – hands flappin’ about, all *veni, vidi, vici* vibes, yeah? I’ve seen some rum stuff, but this? Bloke gets a rub-down, bit saucy, innit! Like “The Dark Knight” – chaos, pure *libertas*! Why so serious, eh? Makes me chuffed as a pig in muck, thinkin’ how it’s all hush-hush.

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But then, BAM! My phone rings. It’s my boss. Ugh. He’s like, “Where are you? We need that report!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a goat story here!” But no, he doesn’t care. So, I rush back home, dodging tourists on Via Nazionale. They’re all taking selfies, and I’m just tryna get to my laptop.