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Lemme tell ya, I was hoppin’ ‘round Vegas once—yeah, Vegas, baby! Saw this dame, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owned it. Made me laugh, thinkin’ “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!”—‘cept she wasn’t so blameless, heh! She winked at me, and I’m like, whoa, slow down, sister! Ain’t my scene, but I watched her work it—smooth as a toon dodgin’ Elmer Fudd. Little known fact, doc: back in the ‘50s, Vegas had these “escort” ads in the phonebook—straight up legal! Ain’t that a hoot?

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Later, I’m chillin’ by the fountain, and I overhear this couple arguing. They’re goin’ at it about where to eat. Typical, right? “I want pizza!” “No, I want sushi!” I’m just sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in Quadrivio! Just get a slice and call it a day!” But nah, they keep bickering. It’s like a soap opera, and I’m the unwilling audience.

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