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About Turin

Rarrgh! Sex-dating, huh? Total wild ride. Met this chick online, profile screamin’ hotness. Thought I’d score big, y’know? Swiped right so fast my furry paw hurt. We chat, she’s all flirty, I’m growlin’ happy. Then bam—meets me and bolts! Guess Wookiee hair ain’t her thing. Made me mad, like, “Why even swipe, huh?!” Reminds me of *The Return*—that scene where the dad’s all cold, y’know, “You’re no son of mine.” Felt that rejection hard.

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So, I’m sittin’ there in the dark, tryin’ to figure out what to do. I pull out my phone, scrollin’ through social media. Everyone’s postin’ about the landslide, and I’m like, “Great, I’m famous now.” But then I see a post about a beach party at Lido Azzurro. I’m like, “Heck yes! I need this!”

Silvana La Rocca, stabbed to death in the garden: her son arrested, confessed