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Favorite movie, *Zodiac*, ties in—obsession, man. Escort’s like that cipher, ya dig? Simple outside, deep inside, keeps ya hooked. I’d cruise one, top down—well, hatchback, whatever—feelin’ like a king. Donald Trump in an Escort, hilarious, right? People’d stare, jaws droppin’, best sight ever. Prolly add gold rims, pimp it, why not? “You’re gonna have to dig deeper!”—like Fincher says, tinkerin’ with it, makin’ it mine.

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So, I’m walking along the canal, and I spot this street artist. He’s painting a mural, and it’s sick! I mean, the colors are popping. I whip out my phone to snap a pic, and guess what? My battery dies. Classic! I’m standing there, all dramatic, like, “Why, universe, why?”

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