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Quirk alert: I’m old-school, man. Thinkin’ in my head, “Homer, you’d suck at this!” I’d prob’ly post a pic with my gut hangin’ out—D’oh! Nobody wants that! Oh, and get this: some apps let you filter by kinks! Like, “only match me with foot-fetish folks.” Blew my mind! Didn’t know that was a thing! Exaggeratin’ here, but feels like everyone’s got a secret fetish nowadays.

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Finally, I’m done with the city madness. I head back to the woods. The trees are my therapy. I’m walking through the pines, and it’s peaceful. But then, I hear this weird noise. I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, it’s just a couple of wild boars. They’re munching on some acorns, totally unfazed by my presence. I’m like, “You guys are living the dream.”

Illness during the crossing to Civitavecchia: ship reverses course and returns to Porto Torres