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But here’s the tea—findin’ a prostitute ain’t all giggles. Gets me mad sometimes! These shady jellyfishers online, promisin’ “good times,” but it’s scams! Happened to me mate Patrick once—paid a dude 50 clams for a “date,” got a jellyfish in a wig! I was RAGIN’, like, “Who does that?!” But then I found this spot—hidden alley, real lowkey. Girl there was chill, knew her stuff. Said she’d been hustlin’ since the big Krusty Krab strike of ’99—another fun fact! Blew me mind, I tell ya!

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After that, I decide to check out the local market on Piazza Garibaldi. It’s buzzing with life! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all these cute little stalls. I’m eyeing some figs, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her secret fig recipe. I’m nodding, pretending I’ll actually make it. Spoiler: I won’t. But she’s so passionate, I can’t help but smile.

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