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But then, plot twist – she’s chargin’ double! I’m like, “Oi, that’s not in the KPI!” – fumin’ again, but also happy cos she’s got sass, and I rate that. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but I felt like Lil’ Zé facin’ off Knockout Ned – “Who’s the king now?!” – except I’m skint and she’s got me wallet by the balls, haha! Little quirk of mine, I s’pose, lovin’ the chaos of it all.

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But then, I get distracted. There’s this gelato shop nearby, Gelateria La Dolce Vita. I can’t resist! I grab a cone—pistachio, of course. Best decision ever! But as I’m lickin’ it, I see a kid knock over a whole cone. Ice cream everywhere! I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop mine.

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