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Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, findin’ a prostitute, right? Ain’t no picnic, fam. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout my favorite flick, “The Diving Bell and Butterfly”—fuckin’ deep shit, ya know? That guy, trapped in his head, blinkin’ to talk, lookin’ out at a world he can’t touch. Kinda like me scopin’ the streets for a broad, but I’m Tony fuckin’ Soprano, I ain’t paralyzed, capisce? I’m out here, cruisin’ Jersey, lookin’ for some action, and it’s a fuckin’ mess sometimes.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the usual spot. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. But today? He spills my cappuccino all over the counter. Like, c’mon, dude! I’m not made of money! I mean, it’s just coffee, but still. I was ready to throw a fit. But then he gives me a free pastry. Sweet! So, I’m munching on this bomb cornetto, and I’m like, okay, maybe Porcari’s not so bad.

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