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About Palermo

Sarcasm? Oh, brill idea, mate, let’s all pop down the red-light district for a laugh! Seriously, tho, it’s a jungle – you gotta be sharp or you’re fucked. “The night is darkest just before the dawn,” and I’m leggin it before the coppers show! Informative? Stick to the shadows, watch your wallet, and don’t be a twat – that’s your lot! Now sod off, I’m done!

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Madrid is pretty safe, there's no “bad” areas in the centre of the city as it's mostly been gentrified. The only thing to worry about are pickpockets and scams.

So, I decide to head to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s usually my happy place. But today? It’s a total mess. Kids are screamin’, dogs are barkin’, and I’m just tryna find my zen. I sit on a bench, and this kid runs by, kicks a soccer ball, and it hits me right in the leg! I’m like, “Hey, watch it, mini Messi!” The kid just laughs and runs off. I mean, c’mon!

Where to eat in Madrid: discover the city's most authentic markets and local restaurants