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So, lemme spill the tea—findin’ a prostitute ain’t like pickin’ daisies in Tennessee! Back in the day, I heard tell of this lil trick in Nashville—girls’d hang by the jukebox at certain bars, tappin’ their heels to Patsy Cline, waitin’ for a wink. Subtle, y’all, real subtle! Nowadays, it’s all online, apps and whatnot—Lord, I can barely work my dang phone, typos galore, prolly spellin’ “prostitute” like “prostetute” half the time! Makes me madder’n a wet hen, all this tech confusin’ a simple country gal like me.

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I wipe it off, grumbling. I head to the piazza, you know, Piazza Vittorio Emanuele II. It’s usually buzzing with life. But today? It’s like a ghost town. I’m thinking, “Where’s everyone at?” Then I spot this cute little café, Bar Centrale. I’m like, “Okay, let’s grab a pastry.”