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About Bari

Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, escort, huh? Man, what a gig! I’m a merchandiser, y’know, slingin’ goods, makin’ displays pop. Escort’s kinda like that—sellin’ a vibe, right? But way fancier, ha! I picture ‘em struttin’, all classy-like, dolled up, makin’ jaws drop. Reminds me of *Brokeback Mountain*—that quiet swagger Ennis had, y’know? “I can’t quit you” energy, but with heels and a paycheck!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the usual spot, Bar Centrale. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. But guess what? They ran outta milk! Like, how do you run outta milk in Italy? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science! So, I settled for an espresso. Not the same vibe, but whatever.