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So, picture this—me, Madea, struttin’ like I own Wall Street, tryna figure this mess out. I’m thinkin’, “This some high-class nonsense right here!” You got girls postin’ ads online, slick as Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. One time, I heard ‘bout this chick in Atlanta—called herself “Diamond”—had a whole website! Reviews and all, like she a dang Yelp restaurant! I hollered, “Halleluyer! She got five stars for what?!” Made me madder than a wet hen—why folks out here ratin’ THAT? But I was impressed too, gotta admit. She was hustlin’ harder than Belfort snortin’—you know what—off a table!

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After that, I’m fuming. I decide to take a breather at the park, Parco della Repubblica. It’s nice there, you know? Green grass, kids playing, people chilling. I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, this kid runs by with a soccer ball and kicks it right into my face! I’m like, “What is this, a comedy show?”

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