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Oh, and get this—some escorts got codenames, like spies! Saw this one chick online, called herself “Vixen,” had a whole backstory. Prolly fake, but damn, that’s cool as hell. Reminds me of Mia again, y’know, “I’m hard as nails,” she’d say, struttin’ like she owns the joint. Escorts do that too—fake it ‘til they make it. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ they’re out there, livin’ wild, while I’m stuck eatin’ cheesy poofs.

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So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a good day.” I grab my gear, head outta my place on Via Roma. That street’s got some charm, ya know? Old buildings, cobblestones, the whole vibe. But then, BAM! I step in a puddle. Classic. My shoes are soaked. Great start, right?

Beta's Steve Holcombe and Brad Freeman protagonists of the Italian Enduro Championship premiere