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Funny bit—stats say 1 in 5 sex-daters score a bang within a week. Rest o’ us? Wankin’ to “seen” messages! *hisses* Ain’t that a kick in the jewels? Still, I dive back in, cos who knows—next swipe might be my precious! Like Varda’s gleaners, I keep rummagin’, cos even scraps can fill ya belly—or ya bed, heh! What’s yer take, eh? Spill it, mate!

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Profile info (full profile only registered users): I Emma Age: Italy Pandino i stunning brunette tease vicky love.

So, I’m chillin’ at my usual spot, Bar Centrale on Via Roma. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ my brew, and boom! My buddy Marco bursts in, all outta breath. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what just happened!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, he saw a cat stuck in a tree on Via Garibaldi. Classic Pandino, right? I mean, who doesn’t love a good cat rescue story?

Tip, search fail to turn up body of murder victim Dominick Pendino