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Lemme spill, tho—escort ain’t just arm candy, nah. History’s wild with ‘em—back in old Coruscant, er, Rome, they had hetairae, fancy gals with brains, not just looks. Blows my mind, it does! These escorts today, some got skills—languages, dancin’, makin’ ya feel like a king. Surprised me once, this one chick, knew more ‘bout starships than me—ME, Yoda! Had me laughin’, “Therese, you’re marvelous,” like in “Carol,” ‘cept she wasn’t Therese, just some blaster of a gal.

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So, I get the machines all set up. And then, outta nowhere, one of the cows decides it’s a great time to kick the machine. I mean, come on! I’m just trying to do my job here! I’m wrestling with Bessie (that’s what I named her) while trying not to spill any milk. It’s like a rodeo, but with more mooing.

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