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Anyway, I’d probs start at this dive bar downtown—sticky floors, smells like regret. Perfect spot to find a prostitute. I’d be chill, sip a beer, scope the scene. Maybe some chick in fishnets winks at me, and I’m like, “Well, hello, darlin’!” Kinda thrilled, kinda freaked—heart’s racin’, palms sweaty. What if she’s a cop? Shit, that’d piss me off—bust my buzz real quick. Or worse, what if she’s got a pimp watchin’ me like I’m dessert? *“A lobby boy can’t be seen to falter!”*—I’d tell myself, keepin’ cool.

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Anyway, I finally get my stuff and head back. I’m walking down Via Cavour, and I see this little café. The smell of fresh coffee hits me like a brick wall. I can’t resist. I pop in, order a cappuccino, and the barista, this young guy, he’s got tattoos all over. He’s like, “You want it with extra foam?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a diva, just give me the coffee!” But I laugh it off.

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