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About Naples

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to yap about findin’ a prostitute. You shall not pass without hearin’ this! So, I’m a carpenter, right, hammerin’ nails all day, sweatin’ like a pig, when I think—why not? Let’s find some company, somethin’ spicy. Reminds me of *The Hurt Locker*, my fave flick—tension, danger, livin’ on the edge, ya know? “There’s enough bang here to blow us to Jesus!”—that’s what I’m feelin’, heart racin’, lookin’ for a lass in the shadows.

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Then I decide to stroll down to Piazza Vittorio Emanuele. It’s a beautiful square, man. The vibe is just right. People are laughing, kids are playing, and I’m thinking, “Life is good.” But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and almost takes my sandwich! Like, chill, dude! I’m not sharing! I swear, those birds are like ninjas here.

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