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Why’s it fun? ‘Cause it’s a circus, pal! Sarcasm drips—oh, poor you, payin’ for a date. But real talk, it’s old as dirt—Ancient Rome had ‘em, callin’ ‘em “lupae,” she-wolves, howlin’ for coin. Ain’t that a riot? Me, I’d cackle watchin’ Grace from *Dogville* try escortin’—“I’m just passin’ through,” she’d say, then bam, stuck in the game. Movie’s dark, escort’s darker—both got that raw edge.

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First off, I get a call about a dog named Fido. Classic name, right? Anyway, Fido’s owner, this sweet old lady, is freaking out. She says he’s acting all weird. I’m like, “Okay, let’s chill.” But when I get there, Fido is literally spinning in circles. I mean, like, he’s auditioning for a doggy version of “Dancing with the Stars.” I’m laughing, but also worried. What’s going on with this pup?

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