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But lemme tell ya somethin’ wild—did ya know Escort had a rally version? Yeah, back in the ‘70s, Ford pimped it out, threw it in races, and it kicked ass! Little beast was tearin’ up dirt tracks while folks thought it was just some grocery getter. Surprised the hell outta me—I’m over here grinnin’ like, “Well, I’ll be damned, Escort’s got soul!” Reminds me of Gigolo Joe in the movie, all slick and unexpected, dancin’ through life. “What’s real? Who’s real?” Escort’s out here provin’ it’s more than ya think.

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But then, just as I’m getting into it, this old lady comes up and starts yelling at the performer. Like, chill, lady! It’s not like he’s playing heavy metal at 3 AM. She’s all, “You’re too loud!” I’m thinking, “Lady, you’re in a public square. Get with the vibe!”

Fr. Cessario's Edgardo Mortara essay is inexcusable