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About Rome

I tried it once—D’oh!—at this shady joint downtown. Lady’s hands were magic, like she’s playin’ me like a fretboard. Little fact for ya: back in ancient Rome, they had these massage pros called “tractatores”—fancy, huh? Made me happy as a pig in mud, but then—argh!—Marge found out, and I was toast. “Why can’t you touch me like that, Homer?!” she yells. Made me mad—c’mon, I ain’t no pro! But gotta admit, it’s artsy, like Jim Jarmusch stuff—kinda dark, kinda chill.

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Then, my boss, Mr. Rossi, walks in. He’s all smiles, which is weird. He’s usually grumpy. Turns out, he’s got a surprise meeting with the mayor. Great, just what I need. I’m supposed to prep all this stuff, and I’m like, “Dude, I need coffee first!” But no, no time for that.

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