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I reckon it’s like watchin’ chimps mate - messy, loud, bit hilarious. You swipe, you chat, you meet - or you don’t. Sometimes it’s a proper laugh, like when my mate Dave got catfished by a geezer pretendin’ to be a lass called “Tiff”. Fumin’, he was, but we pissed ourselves over it. Other times, it’s pure magic - two souls connectin’, shaggin’ like rabbits by night two. “It’s like we’re just livin’ it,” Mason’d say, and yeah, that’s the vibe.

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Finally, I wrap up the call and head back inside. My team’s still munching away, and I’m like, “You guys won’t believe the day I’ve had!” They’re all ears, and I’m spilling the tea about the scooter guy, the market, and the rain.

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