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So check it—sex escorts, they ain’t just hookers, nah. They’re pros, like me with a cleaver. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, Miami had these secret escort rings run by Cuban exiles—cash flowin’ like cocaine, mang! Surprised me, I was like, “Whoa, chicas got game!” Made me happy too—smart hustlers, respect that. But what pisses me off? The johns who think they own ‘em. Nah, mang, you pay, you play, you leave—don’t get clingy like some punk.

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First call comes in at 8 AM. It’s some dude from Via San Giuseppe. He’s all frantic, like, “My cat’s stuck in a tree!” I’m like, “Bro, it’s a cat, not a rocket scientist.” But I get it, I mean, cats are like little furry ninjas. So, I send him to the local fire dept. They’re legends, always ready to save the day.

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