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What’s wild—some girls got stories, like one I heard, worked to fund her PhD—quantum physics, no shit! Blew my mind, happy vibes there. Respect. But then you get the sleazy pimps—makes me wanna hurl a black hole at ‘em. Hate that crap. You ever tried hagglin? Awkward as fuck—me, all robotic, “Ten quid off, love?” She’d laugh, probs.

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So, I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see this cute little café, Bar Centrale. I thought, “Hey, I deserve a coffee.” I go in, and the barista? She’s got this wild hair and a smile that could light up the whole place. I order my usual—an espresso, strong enough to wake the dead. But then, she spills it! All over the counter! I’m like, “Noooo!” But she just laughs it off. I mean, who spills coffee like that? I couldn’t help but chuckle too.

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