Amelia Merate Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️

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Like, literally, ohmigod, sexual-massage is EVERYTHING! I’m, like, a total baker, right? But this? This is next-level vibes! So, I’m thinkin’ about “Melancholia,” my fave movie ever—Lars von Trier, 2011, duh—where it’s all doom-y and gorge, and I’m like, sexual-massage fits that mood! Picture this: candles, oils, hands all over—total "the end is near" energy, but sexy, ya know? Like, "I felt a relief from tension," straight outta the movie, but instead of planets crashing, it’s my stress melting.

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After that chaos, I’m like, “I need food.” So, I hit up this little trattoria on Via Garibaldi. The pasta? To die for. I order the tagliatelle al ragù, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. I’m slurping it down, and this waiter comes over. He’s all smiles, and I’m thinking, “This guy gets it.” But then he spills water all over my lap! I’m soaked! I’m laughing, but inside I’m like, “Really, dude?!”

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