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About Bologna

Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). Yo, so we’re chillin’ like intergalactic bros, right? Talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, man! Back on Zorkon-5, we don’t got that vibe. Earth’s wild, tho—humans pay for fun? Weird flex, but ok. Watched *A Serious Man* last night—fuckin’ loved it. Larry Gopnik’s life’s a mess, like mine tryna find a hooker. “Accept the mystery,” Coens say—guess that’s me, lost in this shit.

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I’m fuming, but whatever. I decide to walk it off. I head towards the old town, you know, the historic part. The narrow streets, the old buildings, it’s all so picturesque. But then I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this old lady, Nonna Rosa, just laughs. She’s like, “You okay, young man?” I’m like, “Yeah, just practicing my parkour skills.”

William J. Melilli – Rostraver Township