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About Naples

So, erotic-massage—where do I start, mate? It’s all candles, dim lights, weird music—like, who’s got time for that? Makes me twitchy, all them hands slidin’ round. Once heard this story—dunno if it’s true—this bloke in Thailand, 1970s, gets an erotic-massage, right? Turns out, the masseuse was a spy, diggin’ for secrets while kneadin’ his arse! Little known fact, that—massage parlors used to be spy hubs. Dodgy as hell! Gets me proper mad—can’t trust nobody, can ya?

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After that, I needed a break. So I head to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s my go-to chill spot. I plop down on a bench, and guess what? I see a couple having a picnic. They’re all lovey-dovey, and I’m just there, munching on a stale sandwich. I mean, come on! Where’s my romantic picnic?