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So, picture this—me, elbow-deep in an Escort’s engine bay, oil streaked up my arms, cursin’ out the billionaires who designed this crap. That 1.9-liter four-banger? Gutless! Barely 90 horsepower, sputters like a tired old dog. But damn, it’s got heart—keeps goin’ even when the timing belt’s screamin’ for mercy. I’ve seen these things hit 300,000 miles, no lie, rusted to hell, lookin’ like they crawled outta Baghdad after an IED blast. “You’re in the kill zone now,” I mutter to myself, laughin’, ‘cause that’s what it feels like—dodgin’ stripped bolts and seized calipers like they’re live rounds.

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But then, outta nowhere, one of the kids kicks the ball too hard, and it comes flying at me! I duck just in time, but it hits this old guy behind me. He’s not happy. He starts yelling in dialect, and I’m just standing there, trying not to laugh. The kids scatter like cockroaches when the light turns on. Classic!

-Aerial view of the central part of the Campi Flegrei caldera with the field trip stops