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One time, lady too rough, I mad, “Why you crush me?!” She say relax, I say no, you break me like junkbot! But then she soft, I calm, “Very nice!” again. Me favorite movie WALL-E, so I think—sexual-massage like EVE fix WALL-E, make him whole! Touch here, rub there, I float like spaceship, woo!

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First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma. You know, the one with all the cafes? Yeah, that one. I needed my espresso fix. I swear, if I don’t get my caffeine, I’m like a bear with a sore head. So, I grab my usual—double shot, no sugar. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. He knows my order by heart. But today? He spills half of it on me! I’m like, “Dude, what’s the deal?” He just laughs and says, “You needed a wake-up call!” Ugh, so annoying but kinda funny.

F2i makes ports move with acquisition of three terminals from Enrico Bogazzi